I want the custum,
But I don’t want
The mask. Buy the
Custum I just wont
Wear the mask, I’ll
That note is from Wonder Twin Girl regarding a skeleton costume I just ordered from her on Ebay. It comes complete with gloves, shoe covers, head back, and of course, a body suit, all making up a Halloween human skeleton costume. I thought I had killed it this year, because the bones are GLOW IN THE DARK, but Daughter quickly put me in my place. To me, the note says: hey mom, it’s great that you tried, but you actually failed. Somehow, I will make do with your fallacy because that’s just the kind of mental toughness required of me to cope with this cruel, cold world to survive. J Just kidding. I don’t see signs of my failure as a parent everywhere. Just most places.
Somehow, Wonder Twin Girl has side-stepped a ultra-girly princess phase, and I am not complaining. I’m not saying she doesn’t like girly things – she does. She has particular ideas about her hair, her clothes, and her nails, but she’s also pragmatic in terms of what outfits work best for hanging upside down at the playground. She still enjoys running as fast as she can, and she has told me that girls in her class already don’t move in gym. She is still physically very cute, but has this deeply weirdo spirit too. I can’t even say she’s part adult. It’s like she’s cute young girl + eerie, 1000-year-old swamp creature. Last year, she wanted to be Chewbacca for Halloween. When she tried on the costume, complete with the hair helmut on top of the full body hair body stocking, it was like the air left the apartment and there was no sound. My daughter was gone. It was just me and this deeply creepy alien organism.
There was another time she face painted herself to look like a tiger, but the result was like this disturbing face camouflage that reminded me of the news pics of the
VietCong in the 1970s. She was so proud and gave me her patented cute puppy dog smile but with her eyes shining from this strange makeup — it is the oddest dichotomy. I don’t get it.