Toys, Deadly

MrPotatoHead_09 Let me tell you something obvious: when you step on plastic, hard toys, it really, really hurts. We have a few toys with multiple, distinct parts that seem destined to never stay where they belong in their cases. They remain hidden in your carpet, long after clean-up, and in the middle of the night, when you’re going to get a glass of water or something – BAM – it finds you. Some of these toys have jagged edges, like this egg puzzle that the kids love or the Thomas the Steam engine the stinker trains, which seem engineered to specifically to elicit a maximum of excruciating agony when stepped on. It’s almost like these toys know how to hone in on the accupressure points of the foot. I want to dump a bucket of all these toy pieces to fill up the floor, turn off the light, and make the toy inventor walk across the room. Thank you.

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