You know, I didn’t drink much when I was younger. In college, I was too self-conscious as I turned bright red every time I had some booze. It was truly during motherhood that I began to drink more regularly. Once the twins were born, it was difficult to go out and socialize, and so having a drink while doing dishes and making dinner just helped with relaxing. I have gone through periods where I drink more heavily and other times where I drink more lightly. Sometimes, drinking was the perfect answers, sometimes, not so much. I do remember one particular night after my dad was diagnosed with cancer, my friend Joslyn and I went out and drank and laughed and had an outrageously good time — that was quite helpful as we greeted some grim days with dad’s illness.
And I’m not interested in cutting drinking out, but yes, on cutting back. If you ever heard of the book “Quit Like a Woman,” the author argues that there’s no point in exploring whether you’re an alcoholic or not — because just by the very fact that you drink alcohol, you are already have an issue because alcohol is a poison. She also discusses how alcohol is a tool of the patriarchy — designed to keep us contented with our lot. I think there is some truth to that. I mean, people drink when they’re bored, when they’re uncomfortable, when they’re going through transition, or whatever. Sometimes, the reasons are more ordinary, but the discomfort is productive — it urges you on to explore why am I uncomfortable? Is it time change? Is it, as that writer says, helping me accept something I shouldn’t? Of course, there’s an argument that there has always been mind-altering items in society and in history, and that’s all well and good. I don’t really need to get academic about it and I’m not necessarily that interested in the history, but I will admit that I do sometimes drink to cope with stress and to keep going through a very rigorous, demanding workload at work and home.
In that same way, I think Instagram has become a drug, a numbing device. I scroll through countless videos of babies and Pedro Pascal until I look up and god OH MY GOD THAT WAS AN HOUR! It’s not even TV. (I remember in the 1990s this woman said she wasted so much time because she would go home and watch TV every night after work instead of working on her painting. What would she think of phone life and social media?)
Anyway, my only conclusion is IG and booze in moderation is for the best. (As another aside, my mother and the US General Surgeon both speak a great deal of the potential harm social media might inflict on the kids. There is probably some truth to it. Shoot, it’s not that mentally healthy for adults. But is there too much fuss here too? I suddenly remember yesterday how there was a lot of hoopla /media when I was growing up about how Metallica and Dungeons & Dragons inspired teen suicide. I mean, sounded like a good theory since I had zero knowledge of either subjects. I was only in my thirties or forties when I played D & D for the first and only time with my then-employer’s IT department, which included a lisping D & D master who invested a great deal of time for our set up. We played in the cafeteria and my friend Zeynep snapped a pic. HA HA HA)