Tina’s ProcrastiNation Palace

I’ve actually blogged about this before, so that’s my full disclaimer. Have I run out of memories? Do I just repeat myself? Maybe and Yes.

They reason why we moved to NJ so Mrs. Sung could babysit me with her other two kids. As with all babysitter offspring, I terrorized them as much as possible, but her son, two years junior, was actually a good match. We got into fist fights that ended with no clear winner, but I had fun in their house:

From Staircase Olympics (leaping into the center of a mountain of pillows at the bottom of the stairs. Sometimes we hit a wall, but we never went over the rail), the year of two breakfasts (one at my house and one at Mrs. Sung’s), the Mummy Finger Trick (you cut a hole out at the bottom of a jewelry box and take the top off. The first time Mrs. Sung’s son showed me the trick, I screamed.) to all three of us wearing Mrs. Sung’s costume jewelry set (she gave it to me at the end of the summer, which of course drove her son crazy.)

We also watched the same three movies over and over again in the summer and these are the images from that time that are permanently part of in my mind and pop up in unexpected moments. The movie moments that stick with you? Sometimes it’s because they’re of quality and striking; sometimes, it’s just because they are so, so stupid:

* Xanadu — The scene where the 1940s dancers meets the hard rockers reminded me of McDonald’s “keeping the hot side hot and the cool side cool” sandwich commercial. The roller skating, the mural that came to life, the neat trick where Olivia Newton-John hands the guy a dictionary for a definition of a “muse,” which ended with “Now do you get it Sonny?”

* Superman II — Clark Kent gives up Superman status to be with Lois Lane, and for the first time, gets his butt soundly trounced at a diner (not even a bar!). I still think about how excruciating that was to watch.

* The Clash of the Titans – The most bizarre special effects known to mankind. Attaching pictures at the bottom. Had to resist posting everything I saw.

And just for kicks:

this cover saddens me, because it makes her look like Ashley Dupre, the prostitute who was Spitzer’s downfall. I happen to like Sandra Bullock; she seems like a nice lady, but yikes, whatever kind of surgery she’s getting is not enhancing her face.

Ugh, these are two topics I’d rather ignore and have no interest in…but eventually, if you don’t pay attention, you’ll be left behind.

In terms of technology, I still listen to a cassette and CD walkman. I still read books from the library (which offers books as mp3 files now, not that I’ve ever taken them up on that offer…). I’m barely on Facebook and Twitter makes me bonkers, but you know, if you have to at least be aware of these things, especially if you do marketing/communications for living, because people live a lot of their life online more and more. I mean, do you know about avatars and second life? Do you have an avatar??? Ay caramba, I barely get through section A on the Times.

As for the Middle East, my brain shuts down every time I read words about Muslim, Shite, Sunni, etc., but slowly, I’m getting a clue. You have to. Bill Clinton said the economy will get back on its feet, but the big long-term goal for Obama will be to deal with terrorism from abroad. Fab.

And so, although I’d much prefer keep my head stuck in the sand, I don’t think that’s such a smart life strategy.

Okay, you saw last week how Republicans united and voted against Obama’s stimulus package, correct? You’ve seen how Sarah Palin, after losing, went back to a Republic Party conference and announced how we all have to work hard to make the Republican Party strong again. Um, dudes? Have you not observed the economy spontaneously combusting all over the world? Don’t you think if there’s no other time in our history, it’s time now to put differences aside and make it work? I mean, F* your party, how about making the COUNTRY strong again? Because it’s not just that poverty is a deplorable human condition — if that doesn’t tug at your heart strings, why not consider the fact that poverty makes it a lot easier for terrorist groups to recruit new member? A-doy?

This self-absorbed, childish reaction is really, clearly, irritates me. Yeah, the President is young and a Dem. Yeah, his thwarted Cabinet members are pathetic b/c they fouled their potential to get things done by not paying taxes (which, give me a break, is like when tennis people lose games when they serve the ball into the net). But still, how about the UNITED States of America? Can you just try for like ten minutes to get over yourselves and work together? Because really, that is your job. If everyone could just do their job, we would be better off.

Thank you.

When I lived with my cousins Ed and Aimee, it was on Staten Island in a not-so-great school district. Each classroom has 40 to 50 students and the school bus seemed to hold thousands of children. Kids were packed in the seats, on top of the seats, jammed in the aisles–and all seemed to shout and yell constantly at the most maximum decibel humanly possible.

In order to get out, you had to wedge your body into the aisle a few stops before yours so you had time to crawl to the front. As the oldest, I felt responsible. I jumped in the aisle and pushed bodies forward and waved my cousins in. “Come on! Everybody in!” (which kind of reminds me of Mexicans crossing the border.)

I don’t know why the hell it was so rowdy. I do remember one kid got stabbed in the eye with a No. 2 pencil, but I think it was unintentional and a byproduct of the utter and complete pandemonium. When I moved from Staten Island, I am told my cousin Aimee cried, anxious about how she was going to handle the bus without me. That was all a long time ago.

Most Vogue covers seem out of sync with the rest of the world, but this one? FINALLY, good choice. This will totally sell.

Read or watch her 2008 Harvard Commencement speech. I think she probably favors low-cut tops a bit too much (google images of her and you’ll see why), but dud,e I love her take on life. And of course, when I got engrossed in the Harry Potter series, that is one of the happiest memories I have. Just ate them up.

Stephen King explains the phenomenon of Stephanie Meyer as writing stories that only hint at more complex romance and sexuality, which is perfect for 12-year-old girls,. He says the difference between J.K. Rowling and Stephenie Meyer is Rowling is a good writer and Meyer “cannot write worth a darn.”

Tee hee. I mean, I consumed the “Twilight” series like it was a plate of doughnuts, but I’m also into calling it what it is. Unfortunately, I don’t think Stephen King is that good of a writer either. (I find him extraordinarily good at plot, but the writing itself? Meh.)

In general, I hate going to the dentist. I don’t like how uncomfortable the whole process is, having your mouth stretched open and having two people poke around with pics and drills and spit-sucking tubes — bleech. Not my idea of fun.

But my dentist himself is actually such a nice man and very warm, and he’s very chatty. While he works on my teeth, he often talks about his family, what shows he likes, how criminal health insurance is. My minor complaints are when he asks me questions (I’m busy) and when he gets distracted (because he is holding sharp objects near my mouth. Any other time, that would not bother me in the least.) He used to ask a lot about of my old jobs as a personal assistant to a mega-successful businessman, because it reminded him of Elaine’s jobs from “Seinfeld.”

Today, I add one more complaint: Don’t make me laugh when I’m in the chair. He and his assistant went on extensively about the drawbacks of having a pet. She talked about painfully early walks at 5 a.m. in the cold, and he went on and on about cats, how they never die, and when they don’t go to the bathroom, it’s insane. Like the smell in his bedroom one time…and I had to call a time-out.

But the lesson I walk away with is think twice about having a pet — because really, they’re in your life for decades.

Are octupulets really necessary? Why is this beginning celebrated as a medical miracle? Like I’m all for advances in science, but I think this actually sets us back. I mean, when you have EIGHT babies, you’re more like a dog or pig, no? Like you’re having a litter of children? And besides, if you want multiple births, why not settle for twins or triplets and still fit into society? I’ve seen Mom friends with twins. It is not pretty. It’s like a tsunami of baby.

And our society is making it worse. We’re affirming this mother by giving her book deals and TV interviews. Bad, society! Bad, bad society! If you’ve read, the grandmother of the octupulets wonders what on earth is wrong with her daughter. (Applause.) (Well, bad for speaking against child, but good for seeing there’s some bonkers behavior here.)

See litter of puppies below. Take note that there are only six.